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Lover Is A Four Letter Word

by No. 1 Best Selling Author, Jaci Rae

There are few four letter words that conjure up a mixture of fear and elation like the word Love. Many confuse Lust, infatuation, and crush for love, so let me explain a bit about both. As unromantic as it may sound, the chemistry of love is really just that, a chemical that flows through our body, causing us to act and react in certain ways.

In the dating stages (also a four letter word when used without the ing, D-A-T-E. Just a piece of trivia.), there is a potent rush of chemicals that surge through our body making women irrational and men seemingly distant. Women have urgent thoughts like: "When will I see him again?" "Why didn't he call?" "Does he like me?" Some men play it cool, trying not to seem overzealous and are laid back with internal statements like: "I'll call her in a few days so I won't seem anxious." "She was cool. I think I'll ask her out again on Friday." (And then they call on Friday to ask you out!).

Once a relationship reaches the touchy feelly stage and passion is part of the picture, bodies begin to heat up and adrenaline begins to pump through our bodies, causing flushing and heavier breathing. It also causes the release of endorphins, which then dominates our rational thought patterns (that is not an excuse for not listening to the word no or lack of self-control.)

Once we have entered the Love stage, it's another arena we are entering into all together. While the cocktail potion that we had in our bodies before is still there, it has calmed quite a bit and our bodies don't release as many chemicals and become less lively. Some people mistakenly take this for falling out of love just as they did falling into love and others are so addicted to the initial chemicals, much like someone who has a substance addiction. These types of people may always yearn for that first feeling of mistaken love and constantly go through partner after partner in order to get their fix. Most don't even know they are addicted and that is their pattern.

However, true love is not a feeling, it's a decision that someone makes every day. Love thinks things like: "Where were you? I was worried." "What can I do to provide for my partners needs?" "What's for dinner?" "Do I have any clean underwear?" and other ordinary thoughts.

*The dictionary defines passion and infatuation as: "A powerful emotion, such as love, joy, hatred, or anger." And "An object of extravagant, short-lived passion.

*Love is defined as: "A strong positive emotion of regard and affection." And "Any object of warm affection or devotion."

*Reference: Random House Pocket Dictionary.

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